This is all too familiar. Blood work came back normal... so it's not thyroid, I'm not anemic, not diabetes, nothing that is seen in any of the tests they ran. I've scheduled an MRA for Tuesday at 4:30.
And once again, I'm terrified. This dizziness, exhaustion, headaches, and pain are too much for me this time. I got dizzy laughing at my children this morning. Who expects their 3 year old to say "Mommy, I'm learning how to squish gently!" My husband was teaching her to "squish" her brother on the couch, something he likes. If I can't even laugh, then everything starts to become not worth it. Sorting the clothes to see what James has outgrown (he's in 18m clothes already!) took a lot of effort and I had to stop a few times. I stayed up late last night for Bunco, perhaps that's why today is so bad. But I got ~6hrs of good sleep. So it shouldn't be this bad.
James has been cuddly/clingy lately. And Carolyn wants me to do everything (not Daddy). They always say kids know things innately. I've been trying not to show them that I'm struggling, so they must be figuring it out on their own. What is going on with my body?
I'm feeling nauseous this morning too. No headache, just feel like I'm spinning, sometimes the room seems to be moving as well. Jon took the kids to the park so I can rest. So I'm off to lay down. I just thought it would be important to note how bad things feel this morning.
Dear God, I know you won't let me deal with more than I can handle. But please, I'm at my limit. I just want to enjoy my family and feel normal. No pain, no dizziness, just run and play with the kids without worrying that I'll pass out. Be with my husband as a wife should, without being so exhausted that I just collapse into his arms at 8 at night. To feel normal again and function normally. I just don't know how to get there. And I pray that brain surgery isn't going to be the answer.
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Hi, I just found your blog, and though I didn't read it fully, it sounds like the same thing I have been struggling with for 6 mos. I didn't believe the docs when they said I have chronic hyperventilation syndrome. Look it up. Under my level of awareness, I am hyperventilating most of the time. Sometimes a thought triggers it without me knowing; sometimes caffeine. Now, when every I feel an episode coming on, I grab a paper bag and breath into it for a while. Seems to help. I'm off caffeine because it seem to be a trigger. I went to an acupuncturist which helped. I don't want to take the anxiety meds they prescribed so I am trying all other methods. The episodes are fewer and farther between, and not nearly as intense or long lasting. I wish you luck. Unless you've experienced it, you have nooooooo idea of how horrible it is. I always think I am going to die. I'm sure you can relate. If the dizziness is your biggest problem, take motion sickness pills. Meclazine is the one they prescribed for me. I take the chewable Bonine rather than the pill they prescribed. Same medicine. I hope you get some control over it soon. It is no way to live. Sorry if I am mentioning things you have already tried. Like I said, I didn't read about your whole journey. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteHi. How are you? Any updates for the rest of us who are following this because the same things are happening to us postpartum? I hope you are well.
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